Stop or Go?

This is my Mandala Shawl.

It has some issues.

Let's take a look:

This is my third attempt at this pattern. Versions one and two failed because there was too much variegation in the yarn I selected and it muddied the pattern.
One of those early version was done with Malabrigo laceweight, which was a pain in the tush.
It took another three years to come back to that pattern...
I picked it up again as a way to ease myself into designing, given the choose your own adventure style of the pattern. What ended up happening instead was a lot of dithering and looking at what OTHER people have done.
Seriously....I stressed about my selection way more than I should have. It wasn't fun.
It's been sitting for months. I started it last July, and probably haven't touched it since August. This is a huge red flag with my knitting.
The yarn is Zephyr. It's a fantastic working yarn..but if I'm honest, it's not my favorite.
I have two other large Zephyr shawls that I don't use, which doesn't bode will for this one.
I spilled coffee on it.
This morning I worked on the foundation row of the pattern for the outermost section which has well over 1,000 stitches. Dude. I have two extra stitches....or am 5 short. That sucks.
Am I using a return to this shawl to avoid working on my own shawl pattern? Good question.
It's going to take forever to finish. There are lots and lots of stitches to go with the last section and the lace edging. I'm quite frankly not sure I care enough to continue.